Saying Goodbye to Annele

This was taken at the train station in Helsinki as we were about to board the overnight train to Turku. Siru had invited me to stay with her, and Annele had come to see us off.

Saying Farewell to my Friend

Annele and I stood there hugging and smiling for one last photo before the trip. It was a nice, warm way to end my time in Helsinki before heading to Siru’s place.

Siru’s Back Yard in Turku

This was the view looking out from Siru’s house. The water led directly out to the open sea. It was incredibly peaceful, with tall birch and pine trees framing the view and their own small private boat dock right at the edge of the property. It felt like a perfect, quiet Finnish setting — very different from anything I was used to back home.

View from Siru’s Home

This was the peaceful view from Siru’s house in Turku. Just a few weeks earlier, the MS Estonia had sunk only about 25 miles away. Siru told me that rescue helicopters had flown directly over her home during the operation. The whole country was still in shock from the tragedy. Standing there looking out at the water, it was hard for me to believe something so devastating could have happened in a place that looked so calm and beautiful — especially with my own fear of open water.

Thoughts by the Water

Looking out over the calm sea from Siru’s home, I found myself thinking about how fragile life really is. Just weeks earlier, a normal ferry ride — something people here did without a second thought — had ended in tragedy.

Standing there, I felt a deep sense of guilt about my own suicide attempt. I had been so selfish with the gift of life, and it hit me hard that any one of us could be living our last day. It was a quiet but powerful moment that stayed with me.

Prayers by the Water

I sat there quietly with my thoughts, looking out over the calm water. I found myself praying — for the souls of those lost on the Estonia, for their families and loved ones still grieving, and for the strength to turn what could have been my last day into a lifetime of gratitude. It was a deeply personal moment that stayed with me long after I left that spot.

A Traditional Finnish Sauna

This was my first real Finnish sauna experience. Siru’s family had a amazing one right in their backyard. They invited me to do it the traditional way — completely nude — which definitely pushed me outside my comfort zone. After sitting in the intense 120-degree heat, I stepped back out into the cold November night air, and it felt incredible. The contrast was shocking in the best way, and I left feeling completely cleansed and energized.